john3859
Dołączył: 25 Sty 2011
Posty: 1639
Przeczytał: 0 tematów
Ostrzeżeń: 0/5
Skąd: England
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 Wysłany: Śro 14:14, 16 Lut 2011 Temat postu: nevercouldIcountuponaninstant'ssecurity |
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formenewdistress.RestIhadnone;re-
liefIhadnone:nevercouldIcountuponaninstant'ssecurity;never
couldIwrapmyselfintheshroudofoblivion.TheminutesinwhichI
didnotactuallyperceivehimwerecontaminatedandblastedwiththe
certainexpectationofhisspeedyinterference.InmyfirstretreatIhad
passedafewweeksofdelusivetranquillitybutneverafterwasIhappy
enoughtoattaintosomuchasthatshadowygratification.Ispentsome
yearsinthisdreadfulvicissitudeofpain.Mysensationsatcertainperi-
ods amounted to insanity.
IpursuedineverysucceedinginstancetheconductIhadadoptedat
first.Ideterminednevertoenterintoacontestofaccusationanddefence
withtheexecrableGines.IfIcouldhavesubmittedtoitinotherrespects
whatpurposewoulditanswer?Ishouldhavebutanimperfectandmu-
tilatedstorytotell.Thisstoryhadsucceededwithpersonsalreadypre-
possessedinmyfavourbypersonalintercourse;butcoulditsucceed
withstrangers?IthadsucceededsolongasIwasabletohidemyself
frommypursuers;butcoulditsucceednowthatthisappearedimprac-
ticableandthattheyproceededbyarmingagainstmeawholevicinity
at once?
Itisinconceivablethemischiefsthatthiskindofexistenceincluded.
WhyshouldIinsistuponsuchaggravationsashungerbeggaryandex-
ternalwretchedness?Thesewereaninevitableconsequence.Itwasby
thedesertionofmankindthati [link widoczny dla zalogowanych]
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